"I have found that women who are mean-spirited about other women were often raised by a mother who probably didn't like herself and didn't feel warmly toward women, in general, either. In other words, she's not critical of other women because she thinks less of them; she is covetous of what they have instead."
My Mother never really said anything about anyone. She was not and still is not a gossip. Me, on the other hand, did engage in gossip. I will say that although I did gossip, and have been mean, I have walked away from the anger and hate, and never revisited. I have learned when I am done, I am done. I can ignore, never go back. This is what I have learned from my Mother. She really never was "mad" at anyone, mostly she spent her time by herself, with her Mom, and us (my Dad, and her Dad, included). I have seen her truly "angry" at someone, totally angry, to say a few choice words at the person, then never, ever, ever to speak or look at them again. When she was done, she was done.
I have had the misfortune to have met a truly mean woman. I knew that she was angry and mean, but it was never directed at me. I often wondered to myself, if I could be that mean, hurtful, disrespectful and have realized that I can't. I have used what my mom has taught me, to walk away, not bother, ignore. I am in her sight line of truly damaging, mean, evil, nasty, hurtful insults, comments, and statements either in print or vocalized. Disparaging remarks about my character, my looks, my personality. Probably some of the most hateful and malicious words have been slung at me and mine.
I cannot stop this. It is wrong and mean.
I am my mother's daughter, so I choose to ignore.